I Need a New Bestie

Well, Eric's interview yesterday went well.  He'll have another one at a different store with a different manager sometime next week.  There are two available positions, one that he is qualified for (the other is bilingual: he's not), and 6 applicants.  It seems that he's the most experienced, so we're keeping our fingers crossed.  I feel a little less weight on my shoulders.

A couple of weeks ago his friend and new girlfriend moved into our apartment complex.  It's awesome that they are here, and I love hanging out with them.  I also love it when Eric goes over to their place by himself.  I haven't had this much time with the computer in months!!  The thing is... he's really trying to push me to be better friends with the girlfriend, Lexi.  I like her just fine and she seems like a sweet girl but...  I don't know.  I haven't had many close girl friends since we left college.  I lost contact with my roommate.  I lost contact with one of my high school best friends, and the other one is just at such a different place in her life that we really don't have anything in common anymore.  When we lived in Florida I had just started finally hanging out with a few girls from work.  I had been work buddies with them for years, but we'd finally actually all got to go out.  I even started having play dates with one of them.  Our kids didn't get along too great but we did lol!  And of course, just a few months later, we packed up and moved back to Pennsylvania. 

I don't think Eric understands how difficult it is for me, breaking into a friendship with people.  He grew up in this area, he's got tons of friends that he went to high school with.  He knows their girlfriends and brothers and sisters.  They have a history.  They *know* each other.  I'm the odd one out. 

I try to tell him that just because he and TJ are best buds doesn't mean Lexi and I will be.  And, again, I have no problems or issues with her, and I love hanging out with them, but there's no bond.  That takes time.  And she's got her own bestie!  I want an equal relationship lol.  I want my friends to feel the same way about me as I do about them.  Does that make any sense?

I just don't want to fake it.  And I don't want to settle.  I've had some really fantastic girl friends in my past and I crave that type of relationship again.  I just have to find the time to make my *own* friends.  I don't like being set up.